Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don’t
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Why Speaking Up For Yourself Is Often A
“Damned If You Do,
Damned If You Don't”
Decision For Men
It’s true. Men often won’t ask for what they most need.
Perhaps you hesitate asking your wife, children or even fellow workers to take certain responsibilities, so you don’t feel overwhelmed doing so much yourself.
Or it could be you’re reluctant to tell a friend, a team member, a teenaged child or your wife that a certain behavior is wearing on your nerves.
It’s so frustrating!
It can also be something as everyday as your wife getting upset when you say something that you thought was completely harmless.
You wish you could simply speak your truth without creating waves, but end up often just stuffing your feelings.
Below, listen to Ray Bedard, a former pilot with the
Canadian Air Force and founder of True Course Simulations
describe the bind he finds himself in
when needing to speak his truth —
“The problem with speaking my truth,
it’s kind of damned if you do,
damned if you don’t.”
Below, listen to Larry Rosenberg, PhD,
a retired marketing professor and star of The Larry Show
describe the actual physical problems
he experiences when having to stuff his feelings.
“Bottling it up can cause headaches or ill
feelings or just negative feelings about myself.”
Below, listen to Sherry Farrell, a real estate broker and mom,
hilariously describe the tongue-tied bind she finds herself in when
wanting to express her needs —
“You start off saying keep peace at all costs . . .
and you silently suffer . . .”
Below, listen to Dr. Deborah Kearney,
a prominent educator and founder of Job Smart Enterprises
describe the tortuous bind she too experiences
when wanting to Speak Her Truth —
“The problem of Speaking Your Truth
is working through the emotion of it.
I don’t do it well.”
Women, including your wife, usually are
even more inhibited speaking up to get
their needs fulfilled than men —
Listen to what Wayne, a gentleman I struck up a conversation with,
had to say about the problems he faces
Speaking His Truth —
“Most people lie to each other
and call it having a relationship.”